Hey guys,
man what a tough time, since i was sick over christmas ive let myself go a bit :( bingeing, and i need to stop, ive put on an half an inch around my waist! :'( its worse at college, all my free lessons are in the middle of the day and the boredom leads you to food. we've finished now for a week, so im aiming to get back on my calorie plan and into the right frame of mind ready for when i go back. im aiming to lose 13 ibs by april 1st. i'll let you know how that goes, but if i can get my head into gear i know i'll be able to do it easily :) today ive had 700 calories and burned off 200 of them. So 500 really. that isnt too bad. im going to start a diet as of tomorrow for thirty days. i will have three different "days" on alteration; day 1= 500 calories (as much/little excerise as i want) day 2=600 cals and 2hrs+ excerise. day 3= 350calories and at least 1hrs excerise. once again i'll let you know how it goes. Anyway thats enough for tonight, i'll update soon :)
Love Lily <3
"Stay Strong, Starve on"
Sunday, 12 February 2012
Wednesday, 1 February 2012
thursday 2nd february 2012
well its been a fair few months since ive been on here. things are changing, getting tougher yet better at the same time. i was sick just after christmas and was in hospital. it wasnt anorexia related, it was like meningitis but not menigitis, if you get what i mean, it was the same kinda thing. Anyway since then my mum has become proper obsessed about making me healthy, i dont think she has twigged, but when i was sick she kept commenting on how thin i was looking. Now she is obsessed with what vitamins and supplements im taking. Honestly im on cod liver oil tablets, zinc tablets, vitamin c tablets and this health drink which is disgusting but is like 95% iron :/ thats the other thing, im on the iron because she is blaming the tiredness on "a slight touch of anaemia" and not on the fact that im only consuming a maximum of 800 calories a day and that im exercising constantly.
i hope you dont mind but id quite like to talk about other parts of my personal life as well on here, i know you dont really know much about me, except im anorexic, please feel free to stop reading if you get bored :P
ive been with my boyfriend for a year now, at first we were happy, my anorexia was more or less under control, well it wasnt, but it wasnt as bad as it is now...anyway, i went on holiday to Jamaica back in summer with my family. nd i gotta say, that place truly is probably the best on the planet. for two weeks all my problems went away, as the Jamaican saying goes; "here there is no problems,only situations". the people i met there will have influenced me for life, but especcially one guy. Dimitri <3. he was working in the hotel and cutting a long story short, we became quite close. being around Dimitri was the happiest care free moments i think i have ever had, nothing mattered anymore. So when i left i was gutted, and sure enough when i was back all the problems came back. Since then ive been speaking to Dimitri on skype, and i still gotta say that even online, he can make me smile so much, even just a minute or two talking to him can make my whole day better. i know this is awfl to my boyfriend, (and i hasten to add, i have fallen out of love with but cant break p with him just yet for loadsss of personal and family issues on his side,) but i have fallen in love with Dimitri, well and trly in love. i told him on tuesday night, nd i know he loves me too. why is it the man of my dreams has to be so far away? anyway enough waffle, truth is i dont know what to do about him. i love him with all my heart, and i know he can help me with my anorexia, everything is perfect when he is around, i jst need to leave my current guy first i guess.
if youve got this far down then thanks for reading, im sorry the focus hasnt been quite as much on the anorexia tonight. i'll try update again soon :)
Lily Grace xxx
i hope you dont mind but id quite like to talk about other parts of my personal life as well on here, i know you dont really know much about me, except im anorexic, please feel free to stop reading if you get bored :P
ive been with my boyfriend for a year now, at first we were happy, my anorexia was more or less under control, well it wasnt, but it wasnt as bad as it is now...anyway, i went on holiday to Jamaica back in summer with my family. nd i gotta say, that place truly is probably the best on the planet. for two weeks all my problems went away, as the Jamaican saying goes; "here there is no problems,only situations". the people i met there will have influenced me for life, but especcially one guy. Dimitri <3. he was working in the hotel and cutting a long story short, we became quite close. being around Dimitri was the happiest care free moments i think i have ever had, nothing mattered anymore. So when i left i was gutted, and sure enough when i was back all the problems came back. Since then ive been speaking to Dimitri on skype, and i still gotta say that even online, he can make me smile so much, even just a minute or two talking to him can make my whole day better. i know this is awfl to my boyfriend, (and i hasten to add, i have fallen out of love with but cant break p with him just yet for loadsss of personal and family issues on his side,) but i have fallen in love with Dimitri, well and trly in love. i told him on tuesday night, nd i know he loves me too. why is it the man of my dreams has to be so far away? anyway enough waffle, truth is i dont know what to do about him. i love him with all my heart, and i know he can help me with my anorexia, everything is perfect when he is around, i jst need to leave my current guy first i guess.
if youve got this far down then thanks for reading, im sorry the focus hasnt been quite as much on the anorexia tonight. i'll try update again soon :)
Lily Grace xxx
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